the allure of failure

when was the last time you celebrated failure? probably never i’ll bet. there are a few questions here.

play the long game

before we jump into that, lemme tell you why i’m writing about this. it’s almost midnight and i missed (almost) writing today’s newsletter to y’all. why did i miss it? because i didn’t plan my time and i spent the whole day on unplanned interactions with people.

do i regret it? no. consistency might be a steady esteem boost but the intensity of the immediate moment offers infinite satisfaction. and so i’m gonna dismiss the fact that i’m gonna fail my daily consistency streak.

of course if you’re reading this, you realize that i did eventually write the letter and my streak remains unbroken. but that’s only because i accepted the fact that i failed (at first) and that’s not a big deal at all. most mountains are often just mole hills. and most mole hills just look like mountains from afar. play the long game.

why celebrate failures?

every experience has a lesson in there somewhere and the darker experiences often have the most value to offer. if only we could look at it that way. by celebrating failure we look at it from a new light and thus we’re more likely to find the lesson that it intended to teach. by celebrating failures, we can condition our minds to develop a positive reinforcement that will help in objectively studying our reasons for failure.

how to celebrate failures?

pretend it’s a success. sounds contrary but it’s something you have done many times before. so celebrate your failure like it’s a success. call your friends and throw a party. when everyone starts asking you what the party is for and why you’re celebrating a failure, you’ll be forced to think of why the failure is actually a success. here’s the secret. it always is.

when should you celebrate?

as soon as you get the news of your failure. the likelihood of finding a positive in the negative is easier when the trauma is negated or at least lubricated by the celebration. and do it every single time you fail. don’t miss a single time. all failures deserve to be celebrated for the important lessons that they are.

this change of perspective may seem like an extreme reaction and that’s because it is. but if we celebrate one extreme ie. success then we ought to be able to celebrate failure with equal vigour. over time, you will find  balanced emotion toward either extreme.

which is exactly how kids treat success or failure. with indifference. the outcome is not as important as the experience. if we can reframe our adult minds to imbibe this child like spirit with enthusiasm and enjoyment, we will have conquered the power that circumstance has over us.

Defeat is a state of mind; no one is ever defeated until defeat has been accepted as a reality. Bruce Lee